Eros was the god of erotic love. The position of the asteroid Eros in our charts points to our passion and erotic turn-ons. Mars shows us the style in which we go after what we want, including the ways in which we express our sexuality. Venus shows us some of the important “trappings” and foreplay that help us get in the mood for sex. The Moon shows our underlying emotional needs that can express themselves as sexual fantasies and needs.

While the positions of these planets and cosmic bodies in our natal charts remain static, their positions are always changing in the cosmos, activating houses and hotspots in our natal charts. The horoscopes presented here are necessarily general, as we are focusing on only the Sun sign or Ascendant, and how these sexual cosmic bodies are currently affecting the natal chart.

Please note: These horoscopes are more accurate for the Ascendant sign, so if you know it, read them for the sign of your Ascendant first, and the sign of your Sun second.

November 2009 ErosScopes – Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius, and Pisces

Libra

You are focusing on comfort, financial security, and pleasure for the most part in November, dear Libra. You are becoming increasingly aware of your responsibilities and limitations, and this is a trend that will last for a couple of years while Saturn occupies your sign. It’s a time of “growing up”, no matter what your age, and learning to take better care of yourself, your loved ones, and the major structures in your life. Others might notice a more serious tone to your personality, and some of you might feel others are not as supportive of you. Activities with friends and groups assume more importance in your life this month. In fact, love or partnering opportunities are more likely to occur through friends or group associations, and this is a trend that will last for many months to come. It is especially important for you, now and in the next few months, to feel a strong sense of camaraderie with a partner, as well as to share some visions and personal or social goals. You’re most focused on values this month, and differences in basic values, such as how you spend money or what you consider valuable in a friend, are more likely to be glaring for the time being. Better days for love this month are the 6th, 25th, and 27th; and more challenging days for love are more likely experienced on the 14th, 19th, and 24th.

Scorpio

There is a real sense of moving forward in romantic, casual relationships for you, dear Scorpio. Eros is moving forward in your romance sector, and this sector’s ruler, dreamy Neptune, is turning direct after months of retrograde motion. For some of you, a lover may be renewing his or her interest in you perhaps after a period of questioning, uncertainty, or disinterest. Certainly, you are becoming clearer in the romance department this month. Romance does continue to keep you on your toes, to keep you guessing, and to surprise you…but who likes who, who wants what, and so forth are clearer in November. With the ruler of your partnership sector in your first house from the 8th forward, you can expect a partner to have your best interests at heart. The Full Moon on the 2nd brings heightened emotions to a close personal relationship. November is a power month for you overall–the spotlight is on you, and you are feeling especially confident, focused, and ambitious. This is not to say that things are being handed to you by any means. In fact, a feeling of being blocked by others or by circumstances is likely with you now. However, this only serves to fuel your determination. After Venus, the goddess of love, enters your sign on the 8th, it’s a time of greater magnetic appeal for you–a time when the world seems to be appreciating your style. Better days for love are the 1-2 and 9th. More challenging days for love are likely to be the 19th, 21st, 24th, 26th, and 29th.

Sagittarius

Until the last week of the month, you are experiencing your yearly period of recuperation and rest, dear Sagittarius. It’s a time during which you may be re-evaluating many aspects of your life and deciding what it is that you may need to leave behind as a new cycle begins. While you are confident and assertive, you are also maintaining some distance from others as you get the rest you so deserve this month. It is natural for you to analyze what is working for you and what isn’t until the 23rd, after which you are more communicative and expressive, certain of your goals, and desirous of turning over a new leaf. Love feels especially private from the 8th, but you are also enjoying a new sense of adventure and even a taste of the exotic in your love life these days. In fact, with Mars, the ruler of your romance sector, in your solar ninth house for an extended period of time (until June 2010), you are likely to enjoy opportunities for romance when you are taking part in activities outside of your normal routine, through travel, or through higher education. Falling for someone of an entirely different cultural background than you is quite possible in this phase of your life, although November is likely to be reserved when it comes to romance and expression of love. A partner has your best interests at heart from the 16th forward. The 20th, 26th, and 29th are the more harmonious days for love in November, while the 1st, 8th, 19th, and 23rd are a little more challenging.

Capricorn

You are bound to enjoy a more animated and vivid intimate life this month and for some months to come, dear Capricorn. While you are likely more passionate and open to expressing deep and even raw emotion with a special someone these days, you also have to watch for a tendency to make too much out of nothing as you look for hidden meanings. Arguments over who does what, or more likely how much each of you gives, sharing, and money can figure, more likely while Mars is retrograde December 20th to March 10th, but you might keep alert now to vulnerable areas in your intimate relationships. Group activities, friendships, and networking come into strong focus this month. More altruistic than professional goals are occupying your thoughts. Nevertheless, a restructuring of your attitude towards your professional responsibilities is a long-term trend–it’s simply not as urgent a matter to you now. Romantic relationships are emotional around the 2nd. After the 8th, however, love matters are considerably lighter and easier. A lover might be friendlier if detached. Communications really open up this month, and you might find you’re most effective at expressing your feelings through the written or spoken word now. I can’t find any stand-out days for love; the 19th, 21st, and 24th are likely to be more challenging days for love in November.

Aquarius

More assertive, aggressive, and animated energy in your close personal relationships continues this month, dear Aquarius. Love might be complicated this month, although invigorating and certainly never boring! With Mars in your opposite sign now and for an extended stay (until June 2010), you’ll be dealing with issues of assertiveness, aggression, and anger in one-to-one partnerships for some time. Mars will be retrograde from December 20th to March 10th, opposite your sign, and these matters might become big issues in your life then. Confusion about the motives of a close partner, dealing with passive-aggressive behavior in a relationship, or dealing with a dampening of enthusiasm are possibilities. Now is the time to keep alert to vulnerable areas in your close interactions. A big focus on career is in store for you in the first three weeks of November, dear Aquarius, after which professional pressures ease. While the spotlight is on your performance, it’s not altogether uncomfortable. In fact, others are bound to find you especially attractive, personable, and approachable on the job, particularly after the 8th. Partnership or social opportunities through business may present themselves during this cycle. The better days for love in November for you are the 5-6, 11th, and 25th, while more challenging days for matters of the heart are more likely on the 2nd and 30th. The 14th can bring surprises that are ultimately fun and growth-oriented.

Pisces

You are feeling more confident, clear-headed, and even impassioned this month, dear Pisces. Others are likely to notice your “spark” or joie de vivre returning, as you are coming into touch with that which makes you “happy to be alive” after months of not being very certain. Any lovers and partners in your life will certainly appreciate your renewed interest (some might even be breathing a sigh of relief!); and new love interests are also going to be taking note. You have a pleasant feeling that matters are moving forward in your life in November. Pressures are easing, your confidence is building, and the important people in your life are supportive. Less focus on the flaws of your relationships and more focus on the “big picture” keeps romance lively and stimulating. The need to pull yourself out of the rut of a routine in your relationships is apparent now, and in fact is likely to come naturally. Any kind of adventure-seeking activity, however big or small, is sure to improve existing relationships, and for singles, will expose you to more romantic opportunities. November 2nd, 20th, and 29th are easier days for love, while the 8th, 11th, and 26th are likely to be more challenging.

This aspect was first exact in November 2008 and February 2009, and will occur again in April and July 2010. Essentially, we’re in the middle of it. This September’s aspect occurred at 24 degrees 43 Virgo and the same degree of Pisces. Last November, it occurred at 18 Virgo 58 and the same degree of Pisces. In February, it occurred at 20 Virgo 39 and the same degree of Pisces. In April 2010, it will occur at 28 Virgo 46 and 28 Pisces 46. Finally, in July 2010, it will occur at 0 Libra 25 and 0 Aries 25.

For those of you who can remember back to 1988, Saturn and Uranus were conjunct in late Sagittarius and early Capricorn, square to this Saturn-Uranus opposition. Themes will be similar to the ones experienced then. Obviously life experiences and other transits and influences mean experiences will be far from identical!

This September’s Saturn-Uranus opposition is right on my Sun, the last two were on my natal Pluto, and April’s opposition will be directly on my Moon. While I am certainly feeling these transits, I also feel that the Saturn-Uranus conflict is an integral part of my nature itself, because both planets are very strong in my natal chart. The Saturn part of me is often holding on to attitudes, behaviors, things, and people not only to feel secure and safe, but also because I value that which I have built, and that which I have invested myself into, whether it’s time, energy, heart, or whatever else (or all). I value things that last, and that grow slowly but surely–things that require hard work and effort, and things that don’t come easily to me. Some will say that people with strong Saturn in their charts gravitate towards the more difficult path, whether or not they are choosing to do so consciously, and I understand that implicitly. After a hard Saturn transit has passed, many of us feel more grounded and able to rely on ourselves. It doesn’t always feel good while it’s happening, because we’re not “winning” without a heck of a lot of effort. But what we do “win” or gain is something we’ve truly accomplished on our own, and it is more valuable to us as a result. And yet, sticking to the tried and true can keep us in a rut, living with difficulty because we can’t foresee a better way to live, or don’t feel confident enough (or deserving enough) to go after it.

And then there is Uranus, and its energy is to stir up the pot. With Uranus, stagnation is seen as an enemy. If we’re stuck in a rut and can’t seem to find a way out, Uranus is there to pull us out of it. Changes Uranus brings can be exciting and invigorating, yet destabilizing and disorienting, at least at first. We experience impatience with life as it is, with the same old routine, with responsibilities that we once embraced, or with commitments that we have made.

When powerful Uranus transits occur, we experience strong urges to break free from our routine and to express ourselves in a freer manner. Conditions and responsibilities that we previously tolerated or even enjoyed are now seen as overwhelming and restrictive. Inner changes and struggles are insistent, and if the outer world and the people around us are not changing along with us, or at the same accelerated rate, (which is more than likely!), we could feel extremely restless and tied down. We are likely to question our lives as they have been, and wonder if there is a whole lot more for us “somewhere out there”. While Uranus encourages us to break free from limitations, sometimes we can jump to decisions that we might later regret. With a Uranus transit prominent, we may be listening to a bruised or misbehaving ego, and we are prone to ignoring our deepest emotions. As a result we may sever ties that later leave us wanting. It is especially important to be aware of this “blind spot”. However, we can’t ignore the need for change. Embracing the need to change existing circumstances is important, while keeping ourselves aware of extremes of feeling and behavior is equally important. With Uranus, we seek freedom, but if we don’t listen to our hearts and rebel blindly, we will not be free!

Throw Saturn into the equation (and Saturn has to be in the equation right now, no matter what triggered point is involved) and there can be tremendous indecision and ambivalence. Saturn is pulling us in a completely different direction (the opposite one!). On a positive note, the extremes of potential Uranian behavior might be mitigated by this tug from Saturn, but the down side is that resistance to change is a much greater potential, and resistance can only create more chaos than is necessary.

Neptune is adding even more confusion and ambivalence to the mix. Neptune quincunx Saturn is an energy that often leads to procrastination, and procrastination is just another form of resistance to change. Guilt is also playing a big role in our struggle. From the Uranian point of view, we might fear we are avoiding important responsibilities because we don’t feel equipped to handle them, or that we are ignoring our more compassionate and fair ideals in our efforts to break free from the past, and guilt can thus nag at us. From the Saturnine point of view, we might fear we are neglecting to consider more humane and idealistic factors in our efforts to make others accountable, in our efforts to keep the status quo, or in our efforts to hold onto our past, which can also lead to vague feelings of guilt.

The truth is, we probably know, or have a fair idea of, the changes that need to be made to an existing structure in our lives, whether that’s a relationship, a business, a job, a domestic arrangement, an attitude, and so forth. Either we have to let it go and leave it behind, or completely redesign it. Throwing away responsibilities or commitments that truly no longer serve their purpose is one possibility. But Saturn is here to remind us that throwing away certain responsibilities will not lead us on a path to true freedom, and that without rules and responsibilities, there is pure chaos.

If Saturn is conjuncting your personal planet, you are more likely to give up on, or be forced to give up on, something that has previously made you feel secure, but that has been draining you or holding you back. For the time being, you may be re-learning how to go it alone, take care of yourself, and meet your responsibilities without much help from the outside. It might seem that changes are happening to you and you must adapt to them by restructuring your life. On the other hand, if Uranus is conjuncting your personal planet, it may seem that you are more the instigator of change as opposed to feeling that changes are happening to you, and that roadblocks to your progress seem to be coming from the outside, from people or circumstances. Something is stirred inside of you that needs attention. Saturn is reminding you, through opposition or disapproval from others, that you have responsibilities to your past that need to be managed. When Saturn is on your personal planet, there may be a feeling that “it’s me against the world”, while with Uranus on a personal planet, you might be feeling “it’s me against my past”.

If this opposition is affecting our relationships, with Saturn on our planets in Virgo, we might be projecting an attitude that others are not living up to our standards, and we might even have a list of things they are not doing correctly; and with Uranus on our Pisces planets we might be sending the message to others that we are tired of trying to live up to their standards, and we now want to be accepted for who we are. Saturn in Virgo might be saying, if you love me, you would be showing it through honoring my code; while Uranus in Pisces might be saying, if you love me, you would be allowing me to be free to explore what works for me. In July 2010, Saturn will be in Libra opposing Uranus in Aries. Saturn on our Libra personal planets may be projecting the attitude that others are not taking the partnership and commitment to one another seriously enough; while Uranus on our Aries personal planets may be sending out the message that we value our independence and should be able to express it without penalty. Both sides have valid “arguments”, and the key is flexibility and consideration of  the needs of both parties, and somehow coming to an agreement.

One of the themes is an attraction to complicated relationships and/or attraction to a “fixer-upper”. Venus-Neptune people seem to be drawn to trouble in love like moth to flame. They might find themselves in love triangles, in love with an attached person, drawn to people with addictions, or attracted to people who seem to be in need of help. It’s hard to say whether their expectations in personal relationships are too high or too low. On the one hand, they tend to easily accept behaviors in their partners that others wouldn’t accept, as they are compassionate and see human weakness as attractive and beautiful. On the other hand, their romantic dreams may be so powerful that they are easily disappointed with the reality of relationships. It’s also difficult to say whether a Venus-Neptune person is easy to please or difficult to please. Little romantic gestures from a loved one might put them on cloud nine; but what others might consider “normal” disappointments can bring a Venus-Neptune person crashing down. Sometimes, they’re easy to please for the moment, and difficult to please for very long!

A Venus-Neptune person can quite readily fall in love with the concept of loving, failing to see the reality of the relationship or the loved one. For example, some with these aspects cling to a romantic notion that someone loves them when in reality that person doesn’t return the affection. Or, they may cling to a romance that has lost all hope. Another possibility is devoting their love to someone who is unattainable or who is unable to commit. Yet another Venus-Neptune scenario is loving someone who treats them badly, all the while clinging to an idealized image of the partner. No matter what the scenario, romantic yearning and longing, as well as delusion, tends to be the theme. The expectation here is that loving someone requires self-sacrifice, and the result can be an attraction to relationships that are co-dependent and even abusive. Venus-Neptune people are often drawn to victim/savior relationships, and they can play either the role of victim or savior–sometimes swinging between the two! Dependency or neediness in a partner can be confused for love. In an attempt to love unconditionally, they may too readily sacrifice their own needs and eventually feel used. Sometimes, it’s about being in love with their own ability to love unconditionally! Forgiving a loved one (repeatedly) can give them a rush.

It’s important to consider the possibility of “fear of commitment”– an idea that many Venus-Neptune people, especially those who are constantly yearning for an ideal love relationship, might initially balk at. This might be especially true for those of us who are constantly finding ourselves in relationships that seem to have little hope. Our friends and family are telling us that we “deserve better”, and we tell them (or ourselves) that they don’t know the whole story. The challenge for Venus-Neptune is to truly love a partner for who he or she is, not for his or her perceived potential. Because they yearn to be loved, it can be hard for them to see that they may actually be afraid of a complete, committed relationship. One symptom of this fear is loving someone for an idealized image they have of that person, as they are effectively choosing fantasy over reality. Another symptom is loving someone who is inaccessible or unattainable, as this keeps them “safe” from a true and realistic commitment. At the root of this fear is the awareness of their own vulnerability in love.

If we repeatedly find ourselves in relationships in which we feel we’ve been deceived by a loved one, then another important consideration will be whether we’re somehow inviting others to deceive us.  Let’s say my partner tells me something about his romantic past that shocks me–or rather, that rocks my fantasies of ideal love. If I react in an overly sensitive manner to this, my partner might decide to keep other similar types of confessions to himself rather than share them with me. This pattern can continue to the point where my partner actually encourages me to live in my own little fantasy world, fearful that he might burst my bubble or hurt me with the truth. One day, I might discover something about my partner that floors me, and I might decide that I have been deceived or used.

With my Venus-Neptune square and sensitive 12th house Pisces Moon, I noticed this particular pattern rather early in my adult life, in my marriage. I have since worked on it quite extensively, and it’s not always easy to do so. I’ve even heard myself say “please don’t burst my bubble”, as there were times when I was terrified of the truth. I’ve certainly learned that the truth hurts far less than lies do. Awareness of Venus-Neptune themes is always helpful, but it doesn’t mean I am struggle-free in this area.

With the hard aspects, we can experience extremes of trust and distrust in love. Neptune is “very good at” swinging from extremes, and very rarely finds that middle ground. We may have been naive in our early relationships, but have since faced some ugly truths. The term “ugly truth” is very Neptunian. In fact, we might strive towards seeing truths as beautiful. With difficult experiences under our belt, we might question our judgment in subsequent relationships. In her excellent ebook, Outer Planet Aspects to Venus and Mars, Donna Cunningham notes that Venus-Neptune people rarely “turn their back on love after being badly burned”–they are drawn to love relationships over and over again. Even after experiencing love relationships in which their trust has been betrayed, Venus-Neptune people usually keep on plugging.

However, I feel it’s impossible to truly fool ourselves when we’re faced with repeated themes of dishonesty in our partners, especially with the hard aspects of Venus and Neptune, and this can be at the root of the mood swings that are so often present with Venus-Neptune. We can imagine terrible things about our partner one day, and wonderful things the next. We might question our own judgment, and fear judgment itself. We can feel trapped in a state of not knowing when faced with signs that a partner is deceiving us, fearful of passing judgment on a loved one just in case we are wrong. Venus-Neptune people want to love a partner unconditionally, but can struggle with their very human need to establish boundaries and rules, not always accepting this need in themselves as a valid one. The general rule should be that if something doesn’t feel good or right, something should be done about it. Venus-Neptune people might feel guilty for setting up rules in love.

Venus-Neptune can fall in love with imperfection. They will see beauty in the downtrodden, the underdog, the lost causes. This is, in fact, a beautiful trait. The struggle comes when we feel badly about the sacrifices we make for a relationship, or for another person. I have said it many times before that the very idea that we are making sacrifices for someone else is a dangerous place to be. If we feel that we are giving something up for someone else, we have to take responsibility for that action to the point that we don’t even feel that it is a sacrifice. We have to recognize that we are giving up something for ourselves, and if we don’t feel that way, then we are headed for serious disappointment.

With Venus-Jupiter-Neptune-Chiron in my natal chart, my first reaction to, for example, singles ads that list all of the qualities a person wants in a potential mate, prenuptial agreements, or anything that seems to treat love relationships like businesses, is some level of horror. Saturn, practical Virgo, and the earthy sixth house are all strong in my chart, so I do understand these things on some level. However, there is part of me that just can’t truly understand how people can treat their love life as if it were a business. I remember when I was separating from my husband, and discovering after the fact that our finances were in a total mess, my brother offered me very sound advice that I didn’t follow because of this basic belief. He even told me that he knew it might be hard to do, but to at least temporarily treat my marriage as a business, stay together, sort out finances, and after that decide whether or not the marriage should be dissolved. In retrospect, it truly was sound and practical advice. I might even give the same advice to someone in a similar situation. But at the time, I felt it was beyond me to follow it. This is Venus-Neptune. Practical considerations when it comes to matters of the heart are often thrown out the window.

Venus rules money as well as social relationships, and a person with hard Venus-Neptune aspects can just as well lose money due to the tendency to gloss over problems. Just as they tend to ignore warning signs in personal relationships, they can let money slip through their fingers because they neglect to keep records or account for their belongings. They may have problems from “borrowing from their future” because of overly optimistic attitudes. They may continuously get the short end of the stick as they lend money to people who never pay them back, or invest in unrealistic projects. Have you ever seen a grown woman cover her eyes and then reluctantly and fearfully peek through her fingers at her bank account records? I have! She has Venus square Neptune.

We’re not all incurable romantics in the more obvious sense of the word “romantic”. I have been accused of being less than romantic, probably because of Saturn and Uranus both strong in my chart. Most people who know me would describe me as practical and grounded. I am generally a good judge of character as well. I can usually call bad situations before they happen, especially when it comes to people who have hidden agendas, scams, and the like. Yet I have experienced virtually every possible Venus-Neptune scenario in my life. While I don’t overtly express the gushier, starry-eyed side of Venus-Neptune, I have often failed to apply logic and practicality to my own love life. In fact, I often knew what was happening on some level and let it happen. Turning a blind eye to red flags is Neptunian.

I’ve recently considered the possibility that I might be addicted on some level to the drama involved with a challenging love life. I didn’t want to believe that was the case, by all means. After all, why would I want to experience heartache? I once read somewhere that all (Neptune-ruled) Pisces, on some level, want to be martyrs. The experience of heartache and angst can be oddly addictive and possibly even satisfying on some level. It can give birth to very powerful and potent creative impulses, can force us into a reflective state, and can bring us to new levels of consciousness and even enlightenment.

I have two male friends who have Mars in Taurus in opposition to Neptune in Scorpio. Both of them admit to an addiction to sexual “challenges”, at different levels. Mars in Taurus alone can be quite hedonistic. Add Neptune to the equation, and the addiction factor might come into play. One of these guys is forever chasing tail. He is at a point where simply finding a woman, wooing her, and bedding her is not enough. He is bored of that straightforward approach! He sets up what he calls “challenges” for himself. I won’t go into the gory details, but there is clearly an addiction involved.

Through a conversation with the other male friend with Mars-Neptune, I recognized Venus-Neptune by substituting the word “sex” with “love”. He talked about how he is attracted to a woman who he feels is a challenge to get into bed. He is not interested in a woman who is all out there, “easy”, or straightforward about her sexual needs. The ultimate challenge for him is to woo a woman who keeps her sexual needs on some level a mystery. I found this conversation interesting because this is sometimes the case for women with Venus-Neptune in their charts, except that they are often attracted to “bad boys” who seem to have a lot of good inside. Their challenges or conquests involve wooing a man who is perhaps on the macho side, who has never fallen in love or made a commitment, or who is not overtly romantic, and having him fall in love with her. And what if either of these people “succeed” at this challenge? Some will be satisfied, and others might move on to the next challenge. Of course, not all people with Venus-Neptune and Mars-Neptune aspects are addicted to romantic and sexual challenges or conquests! It’s simply one way that these aspects can play out. Venus-Neptune people have much to offer–they’re often delightfully quirky, they find beauty in odd things (and people!), there’s very little they won’t do for a loved one, and they can be quite seductively just a little out of reach. They can be attracted to people with a lot of “layers”, and delight in peeling them.

What are possible solutions to the challenges of Venus-Neptune in relationships? For one, we should ask ourselves whether we are attracted to these very challenges. On the other hand, we might ask ourselves whether we are afraid of the challenges of committed partnership–not only the demands it might make on us, but also whether we feel worthy of its possible rewards–that is, if in fact committed partnership is a goal, as it is not for everyone. Not everyone with these aspects suffers greatly. In fact, once we can accept that we are attracted to the complications and complexities of love relationships, our experiences can be seen in a different light–as rich, creative, and rewarding. We can learn so very much about ourselves and our limits as we strive towards limitlessness, about others, and about love itself.

Themes we can expect while Saturn moves through the sign of Libra, on a personal level, revolve around taking a more serious look at our one-to-one relationships. Whether a partnership restricts us or not comes into focus, as well as whether or not the goals of each partner complement one another. Treating each other fairly is a theme, and it can take numerous negotiations and examinations in order to get to a place we will consider fair.

Are we pleasing a partner because we are afraid to assert ourselves, our needs, or our goals? Are we compromising our own needs in the process?

Saturn will be looking for balance, integrity, and fairness in the sign of Libra. We will be redesigning our definition of “self” that includes an “other”. Our ability to commit comes into question. Our ability to play by the rules in partnership also becomes critical. This is a time during which we explore our personal boundaries in partnership. Just how much a partnership limits us becomes glaringly apparent, especially in terms of our own fear of losing someone, or fear of rejection, and how that fear might limit our personal freedom.

If we’ve been giving more than taking, or taking more than giving, in an existing partnership, Saturn’s transit through Libra will point out the flaws in that type of arrangement. It’s all about responsibility and doing our share. If we’ve been unhappy with a partner’s contribution to the relationship, Saturn’s transit might magnify the problem in our minds.

Saturn does invoke a craving for whatever sign it inhabits or planet it touches. In Libra, we will be craving balance, but it will take some time to get there. Saturn slows things down to a near-stall, and this can be agonizing  if we are impatient or wanting instant results. Saturn takes its time, and this is a good thing. We can get to a healthy, balanced decision only if we take our time doing so.

Initially we can experience reluctance to compromise ourselves, but doing so in a balanced way brings about the eventual realization that we need the “other” in order to achieve. With Saturn, a desire to gain control is present, and some of us might attempt to control an “other”, and it’s a tendency we should try to avoid. Eventually and ideally, we understand that it is only ourselves who we can control.

Many of us are at a loss for defining the relationships we have nowadays. For example, when asked if I am single, I can say yes, I am single because I am not married, but I am seeing someone, so perhaps I am not single. What is the definition of that relationship? I can’t even tell you. It might be seen as a friendship, a friendship with benefits, can I say we’re dating even though we rarely go on dates? Is it heading towards marriage or even living together? No. Is it exclusive? Yes and no. It’s open-ended. Is it committed? Yes and no. A friend of mine told me the other day, tongue in cheek, that she is in a one-sided open relationship. Saturn demands definitions, structures, and commitments. But for many of us, as soon as something is defined, structured, or committed, we might feel caged, trapped, or limited. During Saturn’s transit through Libra we may be called upon to define our goals in partnership. For some of us, we might feel pressure to commit to someone or to a relationship lifestyle, but we must first figure out what it is that we truly want before making any commitments. This is a time for making clear relationship choices and decisions, for weeding out what isn’t working for us, for letting go of lost causes, and for defining our relationships by defining what it is we want or expect from them. We need to know where we stand, whether we’re coupled or not.

The more negative expressions of Libra are things that won’t work for us now. These become glaring under Saturn’s stern eye. Resorting to appeasement as a means of keeping the peace is one such negative expression. Too often, partnerships turn into “me against you”. The goal in partnership should be to work as a team rather than as adversaries.

We’re likely to deal with issues of blame while Saturn transits Libra. If we are blaming an existing partner for our unhappiness in relationship, we’re going to learn that we have to take back or re-own responsibility for our own happiness. If problem solving is weak in our relationships, we’re going to be learning how to solve problems more effectively now. Some of us will be dealing with the fear of being alone, and how that fear might be undermining our relationships or our pursuit of relationships. Saturn reminds us to do our share in a relationship, but also to take personal responsibility for our actions, as well as for our own happiness in partnership. We will be learning about our boundaries and asking for our partners to take responsibility for their part.

Saturn’s exalted position in Libra suggests perhaps easier lessons, or lessons that are more digestible, than they were while Saturn was in its “detriment” in Cancer and Leo, for example, and even while Saturn has been in Virgo.

Saturn will occupy the sign of Libra from October 29, 2009 to April 7, 2010; and then from July 21, 2010 to October 5, 2012. Saturn retrogrades at 4-5 degrees Libra mid-January 2010, re-entering Virgo on April 7, 2010. Saturn then turns direct near the end of May, 2010, and returns to Libra on July 21, 2010.

Full Moons occur when the ecliptic longitudes of the Sun and Moon differ by 180 degrees, or when the Sun opposes the Moon, every 29 or 30 days.

People born under a Full Moon are generally very “you-me” oriented–drawn to partnerships almost as if to play out their own inner drama. This inner drama involves a struggle between two very different (opposite) natures represented by the Sun and Moon signs. What they feel they want, and what they feel they need, are often at odds. A long time ago, I read an astrology book (and I can’t remember which one) that stated that there are more people than average with Full Moons in their natal charts whose parents divorced. While this is not necessarily the case, experience has shown me that people born under a Full Moon perceive their parents to have very different (opposite) personalities and/or their parents gave them two distinctly different (opposite) messages growing up. Whether or not this was the case literally speaking, this is how the Full Moon person perceived the situation, and generally grew up struggling with two different “scripts”. Indecision is often a problem. Projection is often a problem as well. Guilt can be a big issue. Feedback that I have received, with my Virgo Sun in opposition to my Pisces Moon, has been on the lines of “I am never sure who I am going to meet”, but only from people who know me intimately. It should be noted that Full Moon people are rarely dramatic in the expression of these two different natures, likely because opposite signs do share common ground. These “opposite” signs, unlike side-by-side signs or signs in quincunx, share the same mode (cardinal, fixed, mutable) and masculine/feminine nature. Generally the struggle is expressed mostly on the inside and with close partners.

Those born under a Full Moon are learning about themselves through their close partnerships, and they need partners who want to be part of that process. If you’re the type of person who prefers to let things be, a Full Moon person might drive you a little nuts! They are very sensitive to fluctuations and potential conflicts in their relationships. It’s not that they are conflict-oriented exactly–in fact, their ultimate goal is to make peace–but they are constantly trying to find a healthy balance. It’s a very Libran type of energy. In fact, people born under Full Moons, even in the absence of any planets positioned in Libra, possess distinctly Libran traits in both their attraction to (or dependence upon) partnerships and their sensitivity to imbalance. Full Moon babies are negotiators and go-betweens.

People born under a Full Moon generally have a hard time deciding what it is they really want and need. Needless to say, it can be very challenging for their partners to know how to satisfy them! However, the positive side to the story is that Full Moon babies are generally very accommodating and willing to try to make things work. (And they’re usually a lot of fun!)

Full Moon Lovers

Couples who met under a Full Moon often describe their first meeting as surprising in some way, whether it’s because of the speed of things, or the feelings they had for each other took them by surprise. An example is a woman who always took things slowly with a new boyfriend, who surprised herself by sleeping with a guy on a first date under a Full Moon. It is said that meeting shortly after a Full Moon is better for second marriages or “eyes wide open” relationships–when the people involved have had failed relationships and are looking for something more mature. [It's generally considered better to begin a long-term relationship or to get married before a Full Moon--in the period from the New Moon to Full Moon. This is because Full Moons are symbolic of a culmination rather than the new beginning symbolized by a New Moon.]

Sun opposition Moon in Synastry: When one person’s Sun opposes their partner’s Moon, the attraction is usually strong. Over time, there can be a real tug of war going on between these two. Both parties must consciously work on avoiding putting each other in the position where they feel the need to defend their habits, opinions, and individual identities. Much energy can be wasted in little battles that are generally a reflection of each person’s inner battles. Competitiveness may be stimulating for awhile, but it can also be very draining, especially if the individuals share a lot of time and space with each other. At worst, it’s a “keeping score” or “tit for tat” relationship with serious co-dependent themes. At best, it’s a relationship that keeps each person highly stimulated–an ongoing learning experience. The ties to each other are usually very powerful.

Sun opposition Moon in the Composite Chart: The differences between two people with this composite chart aspect are at once energizing and challenging. There is an intense sense of polarity between them. There may be frequent separations or conflicts, but a strong pull towards togetherness as well. It’s often a “can’t live with you, can’t live without you” type of setup. This is a binding partnership that involves much give and take and plenty to learn from each other.

Full Moons pull up all sorts of buried emotions, especially when they activate sensitive points in our charts. Events occur that, at first, seem surprising. Later and in retrospect, they aren’t quite as surprising, simply because what surfaces at the Full Moon is something that has already been brewing. If you look back on your relationships, chances are pretty good that the first time someone said “I love you”, a sudden breakup or argument that seemed to come from out of the blue, surprising revelations or discoveries, and especially memorable and intimate shared moments occurred in the 24 hours on either side of a Full Moon. These don’t happen every 29-30 days, but often when the Full Moon triggers a sensitive point in either person’s natal chart.

Full Moons in 2009 (time ET):

Jan 10, 2009    10:27 PM Full Moon in Cancer
Feb  9, 2009     9:49 AM Full Moon in Leo
Mar 10, 2009    10:38 PM Full Moon in Virgo
Apr  9, 2009    10:56 AM Full Moon in Libra
May  9, 2009    12:01 AM Full Moon in Scorpio
June  7, 2009    2:12 PM Full Moon in Sagittarius
July  7, 2009    5:21 AM Full Moon in Capricorn
Aug  5, 2009     8:55 PM Full Moon in Aquarius
Sep  4, 2009    12:03 PM Full Moon in Pisces
Oct  4, 2009     2:10 AM Full Moon in Aries
Nov  2, 2009     2:14 PM Full Moon in Taurus
Dec  2, 2009     2:30 AM Full Moon in Gemini
Dec 31, 2009     2:13 PM Full Moon in Cancer

When you meet someone and chemistry works its magic, there is more to your astrological compatibility than just your Sun Signs.

Certainly, if you have compatible Sun Signs, you both have a head start. You will have compatible goals and career preferences. We measure Sun Sign compatibility by the elements of the signs. The fire signs are Aries, Leo and Sagittarius, and these active exciting signs are indeed compatible with each other.

The Air signs, Gemini, Libra and Aquarius, will have excellent communication with each other. The Water signs, Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces, will all be emotionally in tune with each other, while the Earth signs, Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn, will share a mutual desire for stability and security.

But this alone is not enough to ensure a relationship. Millions of people share your Sun Sign and many of these would be completely wrong for you. You will never even meet most of them, because there will be no other connection in your horoscopes. This is the crux of the matter – if you meet someone, the signs are already there in both your horoscopes.

You have strong ties in your natal charts and when these ties are accentuated by a transiting planet or three, the meeting takes place. How it will turn out – whether this is The One you have been waiting for – all depends on those interconnecting aspects between your natal charts.

The strongest factor in a relationship between couples is a link between the Sun and the Moon. This is usually a strong indicator of marriage and setting up home together. The Moon is the emotion factor in any chart, the place where we build memories and a home of our own. The Sun is our primary goal in life. When we meet someone and fall in love, all emotions are engaged and our primary goal becomes this other person.

The traditional manifestation of this link between charts is the Moon in a woman’s chart and the Sun in a man’s chart. The two will be in strong aspect, signifying probable marriage, and how that will work out for them depends on the aspects between the two and the signs they are in.

For example, the Moon in Cancer in the woman’s Chart and the Sun in Pisces in the man’s chart would be as good as it gets. Marriage would be assured. The aspect is a favorable trine, and the signs are compatible. The warm, nurturing character of the Cancerian Moon would find fulfillment looking after the artistic, dream seeking Pisces Sun.

If the charts linked a Leo Moon with a Sagittarius Sun, the free wheeling Sagittarian would find warmth and comfort with the Leo, and the Leo would take pride in the Saggitarian’s accomplishments. A Taurean Moon and a Capricorn Sun would build a wonderful, materially secure life together – while the Libran Moon and the Gemini Sun would be the most sociable couple in their neighborhood.

This is how planetary attractions play out. The astrologer looks at the planets, which represents the focus of the relationship; the signs, which show the way it works; the aspects, which show if it is going to be easy or challenging; and finally the houses, to see where the couple share values.

For example, the Cancerian Moon in the Fifth house will want children – the Piscean Sun in the Twelfth may be more interested in making a network of friends. The Fifth House Cancerian Moon would want to be a loving parent, even a smothering one, while the Eleventh House Pisces Sun would want to be a friend to the children.

If there is a challenging aspect between the Sun and the Moon between your charts, then there will be tension in regards to the emotional make up of the Moon, and the goals of the Sun. For example, if our Cancerian Moon fell in love with a Libran Sun, he or she would quite literally be all at sea. The Libran Sun is sociable and outgoing; the Cancerian Moon is focused on home and domestic matters. The Libran is Air, the Cancerian is water. It could get stormy!

If the Cancerian Moon picks an Aries, there could be even more trouble. This is fire and water, and the emotional Moon will be trying to calm the fires of the Arian Sun – with little success, since this is what drives an Arian Sun. If the positions were reversed, and the Moon was in Aries, the Cancerian Sun could find those powerful fiery emotions too hot to handle. After all, the Cancerian Sun just wants a quiet life.

This is not to say these relationships can’t work – many do, quite successfully. But both Sun and Moon have to compromise, and employ a lot more give and take. Sometimes a stressful connection can be turned to advantage. For example, a Cancerian Moon opposing a Capricorn Sun can provide a loving home for the Capricorn Sun as the perfect antidote to those ambitious career goals.

While tradition dictates these aspects between the Sun and Moon relate to heterosexual partnership, with the Moon representing the woman and the Sun as the man, in real life, of course, relationships are as varied as the people in them. But the interpretation of the Moon and Sun Signs will be the same, whether it is a man and a woman, or two men or two women. The emotional tenor of the relationship will be brought by the Moon, and the goals of the couple will be expressed most forcefully by the Sun.

If the Sun and Moon promise marriage, Venus and Mars promise – at the very least – an unforgettable love affair. Again, it does not really matter who has the Venus and who has the mars – if they are in aspect to each across the charts, they will provide an interpretation of the relationship – in particular, what attracts the two to each other.

Harmonious aspects between Venus and Mars make attraction easy – this is the `some enchanted evening’ attraction, when two people spot each other across a crowded room and know immediately that they were meant for each other. But will it be exciting, emotional, a gabfest or comfy as an old shoe? That depends on the elements. A Fire attraction will be like a fireworks display, a Water attraction will be deep and meaningful, an Air attraction will be the meeting of minds, while an Earth attraction will probably see you both shopping for furniture next day.

As with the Sun and Moon, the astrologer is more interested in the sign, house and aspects of the connection between Venus and Mars rather than the genders. The Moon will always be the Yin factor, the Sun the yang factor – so with Venus and Mars. Venus shows attitudes to love and romance, while Mars supplies the energy and passion. These two can be switched – a Venus in Scorpio is far more likely to provide the passion in a relationship than a Mars in Cancer – the two will be emotionally compatible, but this Mars will be protective and nurturing.

Venus in Gemini can be a real flirt, which may disconcert diplomatic Mars in Libra but will amuse eccentric Mars in Aquarius. The signs, however, are all Air and all compatible – where these combinations will really shine is in being honest and open with each and being able to talk about anything at all.

Challenging aspects offer a real challenge between Venus and Mars, but great passion and excitement as well. Imagine Venus in Aries and Mars in Libra – these two will argue all the time, and headstrong enus won’t listen to peacemaker Mars, but when they put the arguments aside, sparks of quite a different kind will fly.

When two people meet, it is no astrological accident. Usually two other points in the chart, called the Nodes of the Moon, are activated. The North Node of the Moon and the South Node of the Moon are exactly opposite, and are powerful when one relationship ends and another – prior to, or right on the end of the first relationship – begins. The North Node ushers new people and experiences into our lives, while the South Node shows what is passing away.

We will attract what the North Node shows, and gradually move away from what the South Node shows, especially when these points are activated by an important planetary transit.

The Seventh House, while it is important in describing what the native can expect of marriage, and in some cases, whether marriage will even take place, may also be activated when we meet a life partner. Yes, that old “when the moon is in the seventh house” song does actually have some validity, at least in personal relationships.

The outer planets are often checked as well between charts to give some idea of the outcome of an attraction. Uranus figures strongly in break ups and divorces, so a strong Uranian connection between charts may indicate a short lived relationship. Neptune brings romance to the mix, but if negatively charged, he can also indicate lies and deception. Pluto can indicate an obsessive or uncomfortable element. Be careful with Plutonian relationships.

As you can see from this small sample, there is a great deal more to attraction and relationships as a whole than merely compatible sun signs. That’s why, if you are serious about someone, it is wise to get your natal charts made up and have a professional astrologer compare them. The insights could make all the different between a relationship based on understanding and one based on blind passion.

Gail Kavanagh 2008